I know what I want.......

I know what I want and I want it now!

I experienced God's thick, sovereign presence around 2 weeks ago. It's difficult to describe, so I use the word thick because it was so strong and pure. Kind of like the pillar of cloud mentioned in Exodus 13:21. The people illustrated the Lord as a cloud that went ahead of them during the day and as a pillar of fire at night to lead them. How intense to know the presence of God as fire or even a cloud surrounding you, a thickness that is like no other. He honestly wraps us up as if a coat, making sure we know He is with us! So, I was in awe and could not speak. This was not just a meeting where I was reading the Bible or singing worship songs, I was by myself cleaning my house. God wanted my attention and He got it. It was sovereign, stern and holy. I was honored to taste this small portion of His holiness. Now, someone might be reading this and thinking this girl is crazy. That's okay, because it's my story and I wouldn't exchange for anything! If I allow Him, God can restore me and tune my chords that have lost their key. It's almost as if I'm a pencil that is dull and needs sharpening. It's hard to use pencils where the lead has been worn down into the wood, it's much easier when they are sharp and have a pointed tip. Your writing turns out much smoother.
This is what I want, I want Him. I want God to sharpen me daily, so that I might be aware of what He has in store and eligible to live His word. He made it quite clear to me that day how I don't need to be messing around. He is a loving God, yet He is a serious God. His truth is worth every suffering I've ever been through. I want to be ready for Him, but I will not -unless I let Him shave the dull, worn pieces off so that I might be more peaceful, easeful and useful.