YES, I'm single & I know it, sex isn't an option!

Its 4am and I am sitting up in my bed writing. I was driving a friend home tonight and we were talking, talking about life and circumstances currently happening. I realized in the moment that I'm THAT friend, you know the one that is always there if you need me -all you have to do is ask. The friend that can't say no. The one that won't tell your dirty little secret and the one that will listen or cry with you. Also, I'm the friend that has the worst of luck! If it can happen it will happen to me and I end up eventually laughing about it with you. Well, at least I would like to think that I'm that friend for my friends. I don't know when to call or stop by because of my crazy schedule, but I will be there if you just give me the word. As a single mother of 4 children I'm not really exactly the pick of the litter when it comes to the dating/marrying scene. Yoga instructor, personal trainer, and massage therapist can sound quite appealing yet, there is one thing.....I'm gay. Just kidding, I totally have a crush on any cute 6 foot dude that has a ripped body and persona that reeks of laid back fun. Opps, did I squeal too much? Oh well, you only live once right? That only living once statement gets many warm bodies into some hard cold T-R-O-U-B-L-E. I've seen it, too much heartbreak, too much playing around, and too many facades of what some attempt to make reality. I don't want to be with just anyone and I understand that I've been accused of being the culprit of crushing a few souls. Divorce has no mercy, it leaves you squashed flat like fresh road kill unable to get up and move to a proper burial ground. So, what the blankety blank blank does this have to do with my title? 'YES, I'm single and I know it.....sex isn't an option!' It got you here, right? Just pulling your chain. Watch this and tell me what you think.....if you wanna skip the intro music flash forward 23-27 minutes into it. Don't forget to scroll down my blog and pause the music on my playlist at the bottom, so you can hear the video.

Uugh!

I don't want to be here, I hate this town. I know hate is a strong word, but I do…..I want to be away from this place so badly! I just want a fresh start at times. To not know anyone and build new relationships, no one knowing where you came from and not having a clue about you…..your almost a mystery. Unfortunately there are perks to being in the town you grew up in. You know half or more of the people in it, so your THAT familiar face. "Your so and so right?" "Yeah, that's me." Ding ding ding! You just won the medal for the gift of the obvious! GOOD FOR YOU!
Right now I'm trying to trust God, many of my friends don't understand this. You see a lot of people want to argue with me about what they believe, I could care less. Give me someone to give food to or clothe and that is where I would rather be than debating what is right and wrong(cause that is just pathetically draining).
I saw someone today that I haven't seen in a while and it was as if God was telling me: 'THIS is WHY you are HERE!' I realized I have these relationships that have built over my lifetime here and God designated me to be a part of these lives & they- apart of mine. I know this is a season, I just want it to pass. I must press on. I can not be detailed lately, but the time will come and you will just have to buy the book. Good night, wish me luck to get through this ridiculous place I must call home for right now. Uugh! -as Nepoleon Dynamite would say.

I love the beach, its where I belong!