if i really share what i feel or what my mind is thinking right now -i just don't know if i really want people reading it. every time i come to my blog and the music starts playing -ALL i WANT to do is cry. thus explaining the 10 incomplete entries on my draft page of the edit post tab. this year has overwhelmed me: the car wreck, the studio, the kids having another woman in their life as a step mom, facing reality, blah, blah, blah, wha, wha, wha, wha...............
I'm incredibly and completely transparent right now, which is NOT always a good thing. i have some of the most amazing people in my life. first and foremost God is pouring out his unending grace to me through them. the words are hard to come by because there honestly are too many! friends showing up at the studio and buying passes, room mates keeping me company, sweet friends going to church with me(praying to receive Christ and getting baptized!!!!!), B- picking me up and wiping my tears the night i lost my self-respect and self-worth....i was untouchable/unlovable and you were the tangible comfort God sent to show me different, G- u been a best friend that listened and took action when you didn't have to, thank you H n B for feeding a single mother of 4! very humbling i must say, to the one that paid my rent for December....i can't stop crying -i was prepared to move into my car or the studio, Drena- for the opportunity to take on a second job while everyone is asleep. THANK YOU to these people for not giving up and insisting on HOPE! For those that say coincidence, no its not possible....there is a God that keeps me close to his chest and wrapped up in his arms. no one just takes care of some chic's rent or supplies her with groceries when she doesn't even ask. GOD uses us to share his goodness and doesn't ask for anything in return. we never can surprise God, he knows what's going down. only He can love us the way we need it, his grace is abundant and i am honored to be called His child, his daughter.